My Search....

Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it. Last summer, I was given a great opportunity to travel the country to teach rifle, something I’m passionate about. At the end of the summer, I knew the next one might not be so easy because I would need to “grow up” and get an internship to gain the experience and credit for a resume that I currently lacked. I started the search early back in October and went hard, applying to companies of all kinds (that’s the great part of being a business major, every company needs ‘em) large and small.

I talked to many about this search and my Christian friends calmly reminded me God would put me where I needed to be. Meanwhile, my non-Christian focused friends assured me that with my resume I would surely be a hit with companies and get what I thought I wanted. Now take a guess who had the better sense?

I prayed fervently that one of my top choices like Proctor & Gamble or Bank of America would give me an interview and then internship. I did make it to an interview with P&G but didn’t make it to the next round. During the entire search, I prayed to God asking him to place me where I needed to be while at the same time inwardly cursing the fact I was very unsuccessful with the entire process. By beginning of finals week I had to accept the fact I wasn’t getting an internship. I was ungrateful about it and very angry with God for what I believed at the time to have “failed me.” God never fails you, you just fail to trust him 100%.

God has a great sense of humor, no one can convince me differently. While I sat there fuming trying to scramble plans together for a summer and income to pay the bills God was laughing and asking when I would decide to submit. I tried to say I submitted the whole process back in October (lies) I again said I wasn’t panicking in April (again, I was lying). Finally, during finals week in May I said God, I’m not getting what I want, honestly this time, please help my bull-headedness and show me what I should do this summer. I originally thought it was to take classes and work in Clemson but God had different plans.

I received an internship at a Baptist Foundation office back home. I tried to wrap my mind around living back with my parents, where I didn’t have many friends at, at Baptist office when I definitely am not Baptist, to a job I never even considered two months ago. This job is not what I expected my summer to look like, but exactly where God wanted me, giving me exactly what I asked him to. It becomes clearer and clearer each day….

Trust is key. I definitely got that message so I’m learning to trust God. Living with my parents wasn’t easy at first, it’s still not, but it’s getting better. That’s a story for another day.